My title today can be a bit misleading. It should say “What I need is: Patience and Results!” Because I don’t have either right now.
Yesterday I felt good about myself and saw a slight decrease on the scale. I was elated. I continued my assault on my weight by eating a very vegan diet yesterday and had calories to spare, but didn’t feel hungry. I worked out on the elliptical at the gym and used up 300 calories doing so. Finally, I reasoned, PROGRESS!
I even had a decent night’s sleep. The melatonin seemed to work well, and I only got up twice to pee. As morning rolled around I was anxious to hit the scale again.
Disappointment hit me in the face. Back up to my original weight. My fingers felt tight, I couldn’t get my rings off or on, and my pants felt extra tight… again. What had happened? It shouldn’t be this hard.
Add to this that my husband, now newly deemed “the runner”, has lost almost twenty pounds recently and is looking fit and trim. I feel like a schlub standing next to him. I worry he will move on to a slimmer, trimmer woman who shares his love, now, of running. Something I can’t do because of my joint issues. We can’t share in that passion. We can’t share in the success of losing weight. I worry we will grow apart. Now add this worry to the one about my actual weight loss.
Isn’t being a woman, with all the stresses that come with it, great?
PLUS, my doctor told me I may be pre-menopausal which could hinder my sleep and my weight loss. Terrific. It just keeps getting better.
So where do I go from here? Do I sit around moping and grumbling about the unfairness of life? Eating chocolate bon-bons and blaming everything on the hot flashes that are sure to come?
No. I persist. I pursue. I keep my head to the ground and keep moving – literally. The only thing I can do is keep moving. I cannot let this drag me down or I will never move on. I can pray that God will show me the way and that He will help my husband and I keep connecting in other areas.
What are you doing to keep it going, even if you feel like you’re failing? I’d really like to know what you have found that is successful. Let’s share and become healthier together.