A – is for Anniversary

Life and Happiness, Writing

Today is the first day of Sue’s Revised A to Z Challenge! I got a few of my friends signed up and I can’t wait to read their posts. If you are interested – the “rules” are simple (it’s really just about getting motivated to blog so just do that!) check out my original post here and let me know if you’ve accepted the challenge in the comments below so I can read your stuff!

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A is for Anniversary. I started the A to Z Challenge and had a bunch of idea pop into my head for the letter A, but then I realized something: I was starting on May 8th and my wedding anniversary is May 9th! It was a perfect fit! (I hope all the other letters fall into place like this one did.)

My husband and I will be married 6 years tomorrow. We met about 8 years ago and had a long-distance relationship for a few years before he moved to my town and we got married. (But not before making me wait for almost a year before proposing!) The first 6 years have had their ups and downs. We learned many things about one another and we’ve grown as a couple. For the most part, John has been my rock during those 6 years. My last relationship had left me very damaged and it’s taken our entire relationship so far for me to overcome some of the mentally abusive things I was subject to. John has stood by me through it all. And by “it all” I mean – irrational behavior, threats to leave (before he could do so to me), and my inability to trust. I also placed blame on him for things my ex had done. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t easy. And it wasn’t fun. But John is determined to stick it out. We both take our wedding vows (you know – for better or worse?) very seriously.

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With all that said, we do have a good time together and we often say we’re each other’s best friends. Our communication is easy and constant – a true sign, in my opinion, of a solid relationship. I’ve overcome many of my issues and can honestly say I’m a stronger, more confident person thanks, in part, to John. (God had a lot to do with it too!)

John recently decided to go back to school and obtain his doctorate. He’s in the early stages and things are not yet set in stone, but he’s been having some doubts about it along the way. He worries that our relationship will suffer due to all the work it will entail. I must admit, I’m a bit worried too. I like to be pampered. I like his undivided attention and I like planning getaways and time with each other. A lot of that will NOT happen while he’s in school. It’ll be about 5-7 years of hard work, stress, late nights, and hard work. (Oh, did I already say that?)

But here’s the thing: Now it’s his turn. The first six years of our marriage John held me up. He helped me work through my fears, held me when I cried, pushed me to consider new options and he encouraged me to quit my job and follow my dreams. Now I want to do the same for him. I know being on that side of the coin isn’t really all that fun. It’s kind of like being the designated driver. You know you need to do it – it’s your turn – but it really sucks to watch your friends just let loose while you need to always be the adult. (Don’t get me wrong – he had his moments too, but it’s been mostly one sided up to this point.)

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Me leaning on him… now it’s his turn.

 

Guess what? It’s my turn to be the adult. It’s my turn to be the encourager, the supporter, the cleaner of the house (this is the one I really hate) and to help him to flourish and succeed.

I wouldn’t want it any other way really. I’m ready for it. John (and God) has prepared me.

So, on this our 6th Wedding Anniversary, I want to say,

“I love you John. You can do this. I’m right here holding out my arms when you need me. The next few years are going to be awesome.”

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